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23 December 2012 @ 10:12 am
Author: omi_ohmy
Recipient: alisanne
Title: Coffee, Cakes and Doorknob Snakes
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco, Ron/Hermione
Summary: Harry's house is trying to kill him, and only one person can help him: pity it's Draco Malfoy.
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warning(s): None.
Epilogue compliant? Nope, not at all.
Word Count: ~40,900
Author's Notes: I always admire the way you fit so much into a 100 word drabble, alisanne, and somehow that became a desire to write you a 40k fic. I have tried to incorporate as many of your likes as possible: UST, banter, plot, magical theory, friendships and family, kissing, and a surprise guest. Actually there’s more, but it would be spoilery to mention anything else now. I sincerely hope that you enjoy this. :)

Thanks to B for prereading, typo squishing and cheerleading, and thanks to E for a speedy and thorough beta job. Any remaining mistakes are all my own.

( Coffee, Cakes and Doorknob Snakes )
alisanne: Golden lipsalisanne on December 23rd, 2012 07:25 pm (UTC)
Oh my goodness, mystery author, I just finished reading and I don't even know how to articulate how much I adore this story!
You included just about everything I enjoy in a story and a few things I didn't even know I liked! This was perfect!

So, where to start....
Well first, the plot was fabulous. Draco as the dedicated and brilliant Curse Breaker (with a penchant for great coffee) was fabulous. And Harry the Auror is always a favorite. Allowing Draco to see through his cultivated bumbling persona was a lovely touch.
The UST and banter were just right, too. UST can be trying if it goes on for too long but this was perfectly timed, just delightful. And of course the sex was delicious. I guess I must have mentioned in my sign up how much I love desk!sex/semipublic!sex? Heh. That was beautifully handled.
Poor Ron. *giggles* He really does know way too much about Harry's personal life now, doesn't he? *pets him*

The mystery of Grimmauld was really well done and I love how you solved the curse on the house. And that scene where Draco added Harry to the tapestry made me tear up. It really was all that Harry wanted, bless him. And yay that he got his home and his family in the end. The magical theory you incorporated here was imaginative and fit in perfectly with JK's world (although something tells me you gave it more thought than she did, lol). Awesome job with that!

Oh, and having Hermione and Pansy as healers was perfect, too. Fit them both to a tee.

Also? Thank you for Severus. He was perfect. Of course his relationship with harry would be...complicated. :) And I LOVE that he had such a sweet tooth. *giggles*

Having Draco reconcile with Andromeda and Teddy was the perfect way to end this as well. *happy sigh*

So, in sum: I LOVE THIS UTTERLY, it's WONDERFUL, and I totally won the hd hols fic lottery, yay me! ♥
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU so much! ♥
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:09 pm (UTC)
I'm so glad that you like this! I had an absolute blast writing it, I would walk around and think of silly things to put in, and generally smile a lot. You had a fantastic list of likes and it genuinely was a real pleasure trying to get them all in one fic! This is the first time I've written Snape, which I enjoyed, and I think I may also need to explore desk!sex further, lol.

Thank you for your lovely comment, and for being so lovely, and for writing lots all the time so that LJ stalking you was easy. :) ♥
(no subject) - alisanne on January 17th, 2013 04:30 am (UTC) (Expand)
Bring forth the tale of dicks: curlewbirdsofshore on December 23rd, 2012 08:02 pm (UTC)
I love this so much, O Author of Mystery; you have filled me full of Christmas cheer. Where to start? I love your Draco so hard. 'Golden and pissed off' - oof. He is completely swoonworthy. The wall leaning! The swishing, the flowing, and the buttons! His pointy footprints! I love his rudeness, his pickiness, and his realness.

Then we have your delicious Harry, so full of cheeky charm. He's so Harry. A little bit naughty, a bit vulnerable, a bit brave, a bit emotional, and short-tempered, and loving. All of the characters are so beautifully themselves. I love your George, your Walburga, and, of course, I *adore* your cake-eating Snape. Your affection for canon comes across very strongly, in all of these portrayals, and in your clever and beautiful original magic which is woven into the story so intricately and perfectly.

And then there's all the lovely humour sprinkled everywhere. Poor Ron, the splinters, "that was more a kind of one-off thing" ahahaa. "bashed things" aheeheehee. Bickering about the price of trousers is classic. I must stop: I could quote you about 20k of my favourite bits :D

Anyway, BRAVO. It's an instant classic. I didn't even mention the unffy UST and delicious desk smut and all the saucy banter. *happy sigh* ♥
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:12 pm (UTC)
You are being lovely, as always. Thank you for all your cheerleading, and for reading this one tiny bit at a time. I think you're right, I do feel much affection for canon, and I'm glad you felt that came across in the story. All the ♥
isinuyasha: love youisinuyasha on December 23rd, 2012 10:02 pm (UTC)
I love this so much mystery author, the plot was so wonderful and your Harry and Draco were brilliantly brought to life...their relationship developed wonderfully as well, can't say how much I loved and enjoyed this ride!
Love love love it :D
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:13 pm (UTC)
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)
miles to go before she sleepspurelush on December 23rd, 2012 10:48 pm (UTC)
My favourite part was definitely the doorknob snakes. They were delightful!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:14 pm (UTC)
I had so much fun with the doorknob snakes! I'm glad you liked them too. :)
hazel_wandhazel_wand on December 24th, 2012 02:09 am (UTC)
Ooh, I really enjoyed this. So much so that it's 3am because I've stated up late reading it. I loved the premise of the story, especially Draco's career choice and the way he acts towards others. I liked how much both he and Harry had grown up whilst retaining their canon traits from the books. Their relationship developed perfectly and the ending was really satisfying.
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:28 pm (UTC)
Oh, I approve of 3am reading! I'm pleased that you thought they were grown up but retained canon traits, I wanted to imagine how they'd be a few years down the line, so it made me happy to see your comment. I'm glad you liked the story. :)
Sappho at Sunset: HIMYM - Awesomesapphoatsunset on December 24th, 2012 03:02 am (UTC)
“Greetings, Parselmouth and Sex on a Stick. Enter,” it hissed, the coils of its body twisting as the door swung open.

HAHAHA! A Perfect way to end such a wonderfully perfect fic. ♥
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:28 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it, and thanks for commenting. :)
adafrog: James.againadafrog on December 24th, 2012 03:03 am (UTC)
Wow, that was brilliant!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:29 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the fic. :)
robinellen: owlrobinellen on December 24th, 2012 04:01 am (UTC)
Oh, this is just lovely. I like the original reason they come together, I love Harry's talking to the doorknobs, I adored how Draco replaced the missing names on the tapestry -- and most of all, I like how they're very true to their characters and yet they shift and begin turning toward each other. Just nicely done through and through :)
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 01:57 pm (UTC)
Thanks, the doorknobs were fun, but the tapestry bits were just so satisfying to write. Thanks for your lovely comment. :)
Shivshiv5468 on December 24th, 2012 10:39 am (UTC)
Hee that was delightful. Poor Ron, hermione and pansy forming an alliance, and Harry and Draco finding their place in the world
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 16th, 2013 02:08 pm (UTC)
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it. :)
(Deleted comment)
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:42 am (UTC)
I'm so glad you liked my story! I have great affection for Harry and Draco, and this was my chance to really indulge in it. :)
Truthful Plum Logical Horsemegyal on December 24th, 2012 01:47 pm (UTC)
I love stories with family wards and family magic/lore, and this one was so delightful. My favourite part was [spoileryish comment for those who like to read the comments first.]when Draco was putting the names back on the tapestry, and adding Harry's. That was so heart-warming for me.
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:44 am (UTC)
I'm glad you like this, I enjoyed thinking about wards and what that would mean for Grimmauld Place, and as for the tapestry... I can't think of it any other way, now. (and thanks for the spoiler cut - very considerate and I did want that bit to be a surprise).
gingertart: xmasgingertart50 on December 24th, 2012 02:36 pm (UTC)
Here on Alisanne's rec. Not my usual pairing but I loved this fic! Loved the banter, the gradual realisation of what they both felt, and the friendships with Snape, Pansy, Hermione, Ron and George. The magic in the house and the wards was fascinating and the ending, with Draco making his peace with Andomeda and the Weasleys, was lovely. A delightful Christmas fic, thank you!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:49 am (UTC)
Thanks so much for stepping out of your usual pairing, and for leaving such a lovely comment. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
ShadowNiteWolf: Severusshadownitewolf on December 24th, 2012 04:55 pm (UTC)
Such an amazing fic! I loved reading everything about it!
Alisanne is such a lucky giftee to have such a lovely fic written for her! :D
Love love love :DD
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:50 am (UTC)
Thank you. :) I really enjoyed writing for Alisanne, she had such a great list of 'likes' to work with. And of course I'm glad that you like this too!
fantasyfiend09: Rain Postcard Red Rahlfantasyfiend09 on December 24th, 2012 05:42 pm (UTC)
What a great read! I loved all of the magical theory. It was great watching Draco explore all of the possible sources and causes of the incidents. That, and it allowed for such delicious UST. Harry mooning over Draco at the coffee shop and loving the smudge on his forehead was great. Oh, and all of the arse staring. The portraits and the snake motifs made the house so sentient and magical.

I love Curse Breaker!Draco, and you wrote him beautifully. He was so blunt and all-business in the beginning, but we slowly got glimpses of the man behind the walls. You showed how clever, hard-working, and dedicated he was, and it was all the sexier to see all of that intensity poured into mending the Black family tree--as if he could single-handedly remove blood prejudices from the wizarding world.

The supporting cast was wonderful. I love Pansy and Hermione becoming friends, and Ron was that perfect mix of supportive but reluctant. It was such a pleasure to read this engrossing tale.
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:53 am (UTC)
I really like the way you described Draco, as trying to remove blood prejudice from the wizarding world. I hadn't quite thought in those terms, but you are absolutely right - he's trying to prove himself, trying to change the way things were. I wrote some of this from Draco's pov in early drafts, and I'm glad that his desire to show he's changed still comes through. Thank you for a lovely comment, and I'm glad you enjoyed this. :)
theirempires: learnedtheirempires on December 24th, 2012 06:34 pm (UTC)
This is such a brilliant piece of work. I love the build up in tension, especially that it wasn't simply sexual (although mmm the UST ♥). There was so much love between the characters and all the reconciliation was heartwarming. Not to mention how incredible the plot is! I loved following the curse breaking--it fit perfectly into Rowling's magical world. The details about the house and the snakes and the family tree gave the story so much depth. And the Aurors and Healers were perfectly depicted. Also, this story may have renewed my love for coffee. Oh, this story is lovely and essentially perfect. Thank you so much for writing it!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:57 am (UTC)
I really wanted to write something heartwarming, so I'm glad you thought it was! Thank for you such a lovely comment - and I used to go out and buy the very best coffees I could, to help inspire me to write this. So there's a definite love of coffee threaded through. :)
vampisandi: vampisandivampisandi on December 24th, 2012 10:34 pm (UTC)
Fantastic story!
Ioved the way the were knowing each other while they were working. Pansy was awesome! And George too!
The snakes were so funny.
Looove it!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:58 am (UTC)
Thank you, I'm so pleased that you enjoyed the story. I liked the idea of them working together, and the I've been wanting to write some snakes for a while now. :)
♥ winterstorrm ♥: New logowinterstorrm on December 25th, 2012 01:06 am (UTC)
I loved all the curse breaking and the wards and tapestry fixing. Very intriguing!
Great stuff, I very much enjoyed.
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:59 am (UTC)
Thank you, I really enjoyed thinking through all the curse breaking and wards ideas, so it's great to know that others found those parts intriguing too. I'm glad you liked it!
shameful_desire: pic#117039058shameful_desire on December 25th, 2012 01:43 am (UTC)
This fic is awesomeness! I adore it!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 02:59 am (UTC)
Thank you, I'm pleased you enjoyed it. :)
ICMezzo: pic#114764502icmezzo on December 25th, 2012 03:13 am (UTC)
Cute! Good job. A fun read for sure! :)
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:00 am (UTC)
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it (and still so impressed at how you managed to read all the Hols fics more or less in December).
daemonic: yunjaeomgdaemoncas5 on December 25th, 2012 01:39 pm (UTC)
\O/ What a joy to read this oh fabulous Author. Your characterization and dynamics between the boys is so delightful, how Harry bit by bit crack up Draco’s stony façade and Draco warm up to him and then all those snark and banter. I love it that they both pining at each other and being wary to take it on the next level *sigh*.

The caravan house of Ron and Hermione is very inspired! I think it was very romantic how they both build their own house brick by brick, discuss what’s gotta be included and what’s not. I might stole this idea when I have enough money to build my dream house, *snickers*I think it may be still a loooong time in the future.

“And my companion?
“The 'sex on the stick'?

“Greetings, Parselmouth and Sex on a Stick. Enter,” it hissed, the coils of its body twisting as the door swung open.

LOLOLS. Er, I wonder if the snakes know the meaning of that…

“More tea?” he said. “Or cake?” he added, gesturing towards the cake stand. Severus scowled, but helped himself to a chocolate brownie, and peace was restored.</i>

You’re brilliant! Who knows the way to tame Severus is through sugar? I adore how you made Severus alive[OMG SEVVIE IS ALIVE!!] n kicking, and he was semi-friendly with Harry.

Your intricate master spell on Draco’s work is very much appreciated, very ingenious way to deduce why the house wanna kill Harry is because the wards is confused. Brava!
This piece is truly joyful to read ♥ AWESOMESAUCE♥
Prepare yourself of stalking in the future(if not already)!!
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:02 am (UTC)
First of all, awesomesauce is one of my favourite words, so thank you. :D

Quotebacks are always lovely, thank you for taking the time to highlight which bits you liked. I enjoyed thinking about houses and homes when writing this, I'm glad you liked that aspect too, as well as all the snark, banter, silly bits and pining. :)
Dracones: pic#110756290dracones on December 25th, 2012 05:19 pm (UTC)
I love this! :D

I loved the banter and the magical theory :D The UST and the parseltounge was also very hot :)

I loved the part where Draco finds out about the "sex on a stick" name had me lol-ing :D <3

omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:04 am (UTC)
Thanks! I think you've named everything I tried to get into this story! I'm glad you enjoyed it all, and the sex-on-a-stick made me lol too, so I'm glad you liked it as well. :)
(Deleted comment)
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:09 am (UTC)
I love the idea that you read this over Christmas. That you liked it too is even better, of course. I take it as a huge compliment that you thought my writing was engaging, so thank you. I wanted to write something warm, and I'm glad that came across. Also, I remember talking to you about Pansy, and, having already written this, hoping you'd find her apology acceptable! Thank you so much for a lovely comment: getting it on Christmas day was a lovely bonus. :)
Hollyhollys_tree on December 25th, 2012 11:12 pm (UTC)
What a wonderful fic! I loooove fics that center around fixing Grimmauld Place, so the premise alone had me sold on this fic. Fixing the tapestry might be my favourite thing about this story, because the idea of these burn holes always made me sad. :)

Harry and Draco working together, the slow build with all this wonderful UST was a joy to read.

Thank you for this gorgeous fic.♥
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:11 am (UTC)
Thank you! And those burn holes made me sad too, and aren't we lucky that we can fix these things in fics if we want to? I'm pleased you enjoyed all the UST (it was such fun to write!) and the fic in general. :)
poopsicle: snoopy swakzoethewarrior on December 26th, 2012 01:08 am (UTC)
This fic was super cute! I love the characterization of Draco and how Harry is drawn to him. Harry's misunderstanding of the effects of Parseltongue on Draco is hilarious. Harry and Draco make such a great team and I love how dedicated Draco is to his work. Also, very hot smut! Thanks for writing! I survived my flight home for the holidays while reading these lovely words! :)
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:18 am (UTC)
I'm so pleased that this fic was put to good use! Having something to read on a flight is always good. And of course, I'm glad that you enjoyed my Harry and Draco. Thanks for your lovely comment. :)
Leela: Solemnly swearleela_cat on December 26th, 2012 07:07 pm (UTC)
Oh, the doorknob snakes and the tapestry and so many other places where you just captured a lovely moment and made it ring true. Loved this.
omi_ohmy: Winter branchesomi_ohmy on January 20th, 2013 03:19 am (UTC)
I'm glad you enjoyed all the moments that built up to make this fic. Thanks for commenting. :)